3 dos and don’ts of your first online dating message
If you have selected your paid or free dating site and set up your profile, it’s time to think about your first message. It’s a pretty thrilling topic. You get your first contacts and you get all worked up and excited. So, how do you go about putting together your first message? Is the first message really that important? Let’s get some answers.
Yes, the first message is very important. You would never get another chance to make the first impression. Of course, your profile is there to make it. But then your first message is your first live communication. It can either impress or repel your possible date. So, it’s a good idea to take time and think your first message over.
Your first message strategy:
Here is the first tip: you can come up with a certain strategy. What if you start getting lots of matches and messages from possible dates? Should you message them all? It can become pretty time consuming. So, here is a good idea. Take some time and write a versatile first message. Then use it as your template. You can send it to all the matches out there.
But if you find someone special, you change the strategy. You take your time and write your very special and “tuned” first message to that person. This way, you can cast your net wide and start communication with all the matches you get and at the same time you single out special people and boost your chances for success with them.
Your first message DOs.
Here are the three things you should do, when putting together your first message. Some of these things work better for your one for all message, others work better for your very special first messages.
1. Study the profile of your match
This works the best for your very special kind of message. If you show genuine interest towards that person, you need to take some time and browse through their profile. Then include some of the info you learned there into your first message. This way you can express the level of your interest in that person and you also personalize the message.
Now, you can still use your first message template, but just sort of tune it up to the personality of your match. This makes your first communication special and appealing.
2. Measure thrice and cut once
Once you put together your first language, you should read and reread for couple of times. This way you can make sure to eliminate any bad grammar or spelling mistakes. You can also make sure your message is to the point and smart. When you write something up, it may seem good to you. But leave the text there; go get some tea or coffee; cool off a bit and reread your message again. May be you start seeing some faults in it. Fix them and then send the message over.
Both men and women appreciate good humor in other people. So, why not benefit from it?Just use a bit of humor in your message it make it fun. However, be careful when using humor in international dating. People from other countries may not understand your jokes. You can never be sure you are on the same ground with them.
Your first message DON’Ts.
1. Do not make it long
Keep it short! Do not expect the person on the other end to read long first message. Maybe you have created some interest to your personality through your profile. But they are just not that much into you yet. So, do not share your entire life story in your first message. The first message is meant to boost their interest towards you. It has to be short, funny, informative and to the point.
Even if you are not looking for serious relations at the moment, there is no good reason to joke or talk about sex in your first message. It can scare people away from you. So, even if you find that lady or guy very sexy on their profile photos, no need to mention it in the very first message. There are many other topics to cover. So stay away from sex.
3. Do not push it
Again your first message has to boost the interest to your person. It’s not a proper time or place to share your personal information or to ask for a phone number or other private info of the other person. So, keep it private for a while.
These quick tips, dos and don’ts of the first message can help you to put together a text that would keep the interest up. They can also help you to avoid making common mistakes in your online dating.